I needed a break. Drove over to Bend last Saturday to spend a couple of days with Whitney and Micah. Since space is so limited in our house now, I needed to bring some of Whitney's boxed up things to her, along with a printer, mountains of Leola's old yarn and all of Bonnie's old 33 lps. I also had an assignment of sorts. Micah had asked me if I would paint an art deco design (his) on the side of their new bakery space, Bread LaVoy. The weekend was a nice mix of activity, work and relaxation which I enjoyed, but was overshadowed by their missing dog, Dewey, (my favorite dog ever). He had gone AWOL, without his collar, shortly after I arrived on Saturday afternoon. The Bend Police have been aggressively picking up "dogs at large", Whitney told me, and charging a $350 fine as a way for the city to make money. When Dewey had not returned after a couple of hours, she and Micah were fairly certain he had been picked up. Since the Humane Society wasn't open on Sunday, they had to wait until Monday at 10:00 to see if he was indeed there. He was. So I didn't get my dog fix on this trip.

The time away from home was good and I didn't want to come back. However my absence caused even more confusion for Leola. Before I left, she didn't understand why she couldn't go with me, nor did she really remember who Whitney is or where Bend is. Jon said that while I was gone, she repeatedly asked where I was and said she missed me. I guess this is a good thing.

I made the 3 1/2 hour drive home Monday evening after painting the design on the side of the bakery all day, so I was tired and not in the mood for Leola's tedious ramblings and incessant questions. But I put on a smile, put in 30 minutes of repetitive conversation, then poured myself another glass of wine and went upstairs thinking, "I can't do this."

The rest of this week has been spent in idle procrastination, depression and escape into reading, the NY Times crosswords and alcohol. I have read 2 books since last Sunday and have been to my studio just twice, only to stare out the window. Very little exercise either. I realize I have to get into a routine and take care of myself.

This afternoon we are driving to Coos Bay to pick up a painting I've had in a show there. We decided to bring Leola so she can see her old house and a handful of old friends she still has in the area. More confusion will likely occur... I don't know what to expect really. We decided not to stay in the charming B&B because it would be more confusing to her than a bland motel. I've got lots of podcasts to listen to in the car and I'm packing several bottle of wine. I think I'm going to need it.